I can’t believe Valentine’s Day is less than a week away! However, Hallmark and Dollar General and other major retail stores, have sent signals with their massive pink and red shop displays, that this holiday of love is coming since mid January. When I think about Valentine’s Day and the spirit of love, I tend to think about my own marriage and how the dynamics of my marriage have changed over time.
My husband and I celebrated our first Valentine’s Day in 1999. I know you may be saying yourself, WOW those are like dinosaur years? But with that being said the memory of that day is so epic in my mind. We did not know anything about each other, we were clueless college students struggling to discover more about ourselves, and we literally wanted to save the world! My husband has always had ambitions of ruling the corporate world, and helping his home country of Zimbabwe. While I wanted to educate the masses, and share my passion of dance with youth!
I think about that time, when it was our very first date, at all places Red Lobster (shameless plug) lol! But let me digress, on that day I felt super nervous, excited, anxious, and to say that I had butterflies in my stomach is such an understatement, the butterflies took over my whole being on that special day!
I did not know how to hold a proper conversation, or what we could possibly have in common? I mean before that day we were just friends meeting each other on campus or with other friends during social gatherings and parties. I remember that I had difficulty figuring out what I wanted to wear, or even how to wear it.
I believe that just the overall anticipation of moving our relationship from friends to the next level, honestly blew my mind! Something in my mind and heart within that moment of waiting for him to pick me up in my little Spartan Village apartment on Michigan State’s campus, filled with Bob Marley and Miles Davis posters, I knew that my life would change forever!
However, with all that going on, I never would have imagined my Valentine becoming my husband and father of my two beautiful children. By God’s grace and mercy we are still a couple trying to figure out this mystery of marriage.
But the one major thing that I have realized is that love changes over time. Since our first Valentine’s Day we are married, chasing our dreams and goals, parenting, working long hours, we have lost loved ones, and jobs.We have accrued wealth, and have been in debt, overcome sickness, moved in and out of several different apartments, and embraced enduring health. We have lived in one country, and traded states several times. We have fallen and helped each other to get back up! We have won and lost several times together in this journey of life. My eyes have opened up to so many things since our first date on Valentine’s Day in 1999. I have become more aware that love changes over time, but it is still love.