The thought occurred to me shortly after the “last three episodes,” of my reliable cell phone totally breaking down, not charging, and not coming back to life! I remember that I had dropped my cell phone in the kitchen sink by accident in the middle of cooking dinner, and thankfully it rebooted itself back up, to use the next day after the battery dried on the kitchen table.
But the reality is that I have literally had this particular cell phone for three years. I don’t know why I thought it would last forever, and we would continue to have a blast on Instagram, Facebook, and Pinterest?I bought this phone after a long hard legal battle with my siblings, after my mother passed away and everyone showed their true colors to me. I never knew people that you grew up with, could turn so “ugly,” so quickly for things that never belonged to them, and that they could never honor the last wishes of their beloved mother.
My heart ached during that time, because not only did I feel that I lost my mother, I lost my siblings in the process of doing the “right thing,” as the Executor of her Estate.
So, Girl I have kept my cell phone for sentimental reasons. I have tried to “hold on to it,” for dear life, especially after those horrible days of battle, and now I have the scars to prove it!
When I find myself going through financial struggles, job hunting, volunteering, and taking care of home. Isaiah 66:12-14 “For this is what the LORD says: “I will extend peace to her like a river,and the wealth of nations like a flooding stream; you will nurse and be carried on her arm and dandled on her knees. As a mother comforts her child, so will I comfort you; and you will be comforted over Jerusalem.” When you see this, your heart will rejoice, and you will flourish like grass; the hand of the LORD will be made known to his servants, but his fury will be shown to his foes.” (NIV)
One of the things that I enjoyed was calling my mother almost everyday. This ritual became more frequent in my life when I became a mother with my own children.I would call my mother to talk about life, marriage, children, and sometimes we would just talk about watching our favorite show “The Voice,” because we both have a love of music and the arts.
The day that she passed away is the day that I lost my mother’s voice. You never truly know how much a person means to you until you cannot hear their voice all the time. Also, I had my cell phone for three years. This three years marks the day that I lost my mother, and this is when I had to choose to grow stronger in my relationship with Christ.I did not have anyone else to turn to but God and HIS beloved son Jesus. I had to reach deep into my soul to carry the pain, grief, and loss from my mother.
If I did not make the choice, I am sure that the overwhelming hurt would have taken over my life. The tears that are being shed as the words are being written on this post are very real. I have learned to reach deep into my prayer closet, and embrace life and be present in every moment. Life is too short to live in unhappiness and despair, even on the worse days.
What I have learned from not having my cell phone is that it is not the materialistic value of the phone that I truly miss, it is the voice, love, communication, and unconditional support of my mother that I cannot get from anyone except her.